Quickies

The Precious

By April 2, 2021 No Comments

Parents live in the fast food lane. For many reasons. Time, convenience, and most important, parenting favor tokens.

Parenting favor tokens are priceless. If you help a parent, like picking up their kid from some event, you’ll get the invaluable parenting favor token. Gollum, of The Lord of the Rings, would call it “The Precious.”

Once you get “The Precious” and realize its power, you will want it again. And again. Forever.

To keep “The Precious” in your life space, you’ll need favorable reviews. And the parent is NOT the reviewer – it’s the little one strapped behind you. You need to get this right if you ever want to see again “The Precious.”

Let’s say it’s a sports doubleheader day, and between games, you told a parent you would cover their kid. The kids need to eat before their next game. Are you going to pull out a baggie full of greens? Is your sales pitch going to be, “Hey, this is organic, free-range broccoli, washed with Swiss Alps spring water?”

Parents need to be like Lyft and Uber drivers, and be OCD about customer ratings. You’ll never be with The Precious again if three-year-old riders post comments like “She made me eat peas” or “He said nuggets weren’t real chicken.”

I adored The Precious and strived to be a ***** Uber driver. The passengers selected the eatery and I let them order the trilogy of kiddie happiness: nuggets, fries, and shake. I didn’t care about nutrition, cost, or mess. I was fantasying about The Precious. My Precious.